Endsong
by anahita
Summary: After the manga ended... Spoilers. (YukiShuichi)


Disclaimer: Don't I wish that Eiri belonged to me. ~_~  
Summary/Notes: Because the manga ended at a horrible, HORRIBLE spot, I just had to fill in the pieces, and this is my attempt at doing so..Hugs and chocolates to Anomay and Janette for their comments and feedback! 

Endsong  
Anahita (tsuzuki @ sluttyukes.com)  
  


  
Shuichi shifted in his seat impatiently while staring at the clouds outside his window. He wasn't particularly fond of long plane rides, and he was especially hyper during that particular flight.

A ray of sunlight hit the gold band on Shuichi's finger, making his heart begin to race yet again. He couldn't stop staring at that simple adornment that turned his heart upside down every time he looked at it. Every time he looked at it, Shuichi was reminded of that moment in the airport when his love slipped it on his finger without a trace of hesitation. Smiling, Shuichi turned his head to look at his love. Yuki's head was leaning against the headrest, his eyes were closed and he was wearing his glasses. On his lap was an overturned paperback that he purchased in the airport during their last layover, and his hands were resting on top of it. One hand sported the same ring that Shuichi wore. Shuichi's gut clenched in such a strange and wonderful manner as he reached over to run his fingertips over that gold band, just to reassure himself once again that he wasn't imagining everything. His hand was shaking. Shuichi felt like his heart was going to burst. 

He whispered, giving into the urge to lay his head on Yuki's shoulder. He raised his hand up to gently brush away a lock of golden hair that slipped in front of his glasses while he whispered, Is this a dream?

There was no answer. Either his companion was asleep or he didn't feel like talking. Shuichi was too elated to care about such trivial things. Yuki loved him. Yuki had to have loved him. Yuki didn't believe in sentimental gestures like exchanging jewelry to prove his feelings. Yuki scoffed at his family when they pressured him into getting married. Yuki didn't believe in marriage. Shuichi picked up Yuki's hand that lay limply across his lap and kissed the gold band lightly. Yuki didn't respond.

Shuichi simply looked at him and smiled. I don't want to wake up either.

~

A taxi drove them from the airport directly to a cemetery.

Shuichi said as he stifled a yawn. Long plane trips did not agree with him and despite their relative comfort in first class, Shuichi was ready to end the day with a long hot bath and a good night's sleep.

Actually, anything would have been better than what Yuki had in mind.

Yuki sounded far away, almost disinterested, though it didn't concern Shuichi much. He learned early on in their relationship that Yuki wasn't ignoring him; it simply meant that he was busy writing. Yuki was always like that, zoning off while he molded and breathed life into his own worlds and characters in his mind. Though he once took that as a sign of aloofness and disinterest, Shuichi had learned since then to share Yuki with that gift of his. Yuki was a writer. He simply couldn't stop those voices begging for life. If he did, he would be driven insane.

Maybe I should wait in the cab while you visit him. Shuichi said hesitantly, while he continued to nervously play with the gold band that he wore on his ring finger.

He replied, still sounding distant. I want you to share this with me, just this one time.

I understand. Shuichi replied, though it was a lie. And that was the end of that conversation. They spent the rest of the silence, Yuki went back to focusing on his thoughts, and Shuichi went back to focusing on the ring on his finger. He clenched his fist tightly so that he could feel the metal rim digging into his fleshy palm. The ring definitely made it easier for him to restrain himself. He thought about the hunger pains in his belly, and the heaviness of his eyelids, and the fact that Yuki was being an ass by dragging him to his dead boyfriend's grave when they should have been celebrating what they had together!

Shuichi was very proud of how he was restraining himself.

The cab pulled up in front of a withered cemetery. That particularly overcast afternoon made the scene look more dreary and depressing than it normally would have. Shuichi said nothing as Yuki took him by the hand and led him down a winding stone path. Yuki didn't hesitate at all, as if he was as familiar with that path as his own home. Shuichi swallowed nervously. Despite the fact that he was still elated from Yuki's gift earlier, that cemetery was the absolute last place he wanted to be, visiting the grave of the man who he had to share Yuki's heart with. He hated him. The man hurt Yuki in the most hateful, humiliating way, and Yuki still loved him. Shuichi wanted Yuki's love all to himself. He didn't care that he was being selfish.

Yuki stopped suddenly. We're here.

I hope to heaven his soul is gone. Read the gravestone, carved underneath that man's name in gray granite. 

Yuki released his hold on Shuichi's hand and fell to his knees on earth that was damp and swollen from a recent rainfall. He lowered his head as if holding a silent conversation or perhaps saying a prayer for the soul of the one who rested beneath the ground there. Shuichi looked away for a moment, feeling like he owed Yuki and his special person some semblance of privacy, despite the fact that Yuki specifically said that he wanted them to meet. But hearing a pained sob brought his attention back to the pitiful man kneeling in front of a cold, silent grave.

Shuichi bit his lip. He saw tears roll down Yuki's cheeks. And his chest was heaving softly. Seeing Yuki in such pain broke his heart, and he too could feel his eyes sting and burn from the hot saline tears that welled up within them.

He quickly diverted his eyes and frantically. He hated seeing Yuki like that, and he hated the fact that he couldn't do anything to help him feel better. Fuck you and your rotting corpse Shuichi thought, immediately feeling horrible for it. No, this was a cemetery. He should be more respectful. Yuki loved him, even all those years after his death. The man lying there had the most precious gift in the whole universe, He had Yuki's love. And he was dead and wasn't able to share something so sacred He envied the man resting there. He pitied the man resting there.

Please let go of him. Please tell him not to cry anymore, please tell him to take care of himself and stop forgetting to take his medication, please tell him that there are people here who love him. Please tell him to stop smoking and drinking so much. It's not good for his stomach. It couldn't hurt. The only times Yuki showed any emotion is when that man was involved anyway. Maybe Yuki loved ihim/i enough to actually listen

Shuichi sighed. He was exhausted. Since leaving Tokyo, he only managed to get 6 hours of sleep – and most of that was on the plane. He rubbed his eyes. They were beginning to sting painfully from the tears culminating from the frustration of his helplessness to ease Yuki's pain as well as his own exhaustion. 

Shuichi turned to face Yuki again, and found him sitting cross-legged on the grave, ignoring the wet ground below, and facing the gravestone. His mouth wasn't moving, and the tears were dried up, though his eyes were still red and wet. Shuichi bit his lip, wanting to say something but nothing came to mind. 

He wondered if Yuki would react the same way if it were him buried beneath that spot, as morbid as the idea was.

Hey Yuki

What is it?

You look tired. Shuichi said, walking up to his lover and gently placing a hand on his shoulder.

He was slightly surprised to see Yuki stand up and join him So do you. He said.

~

He wasn't sure what time it was when he awoke, vaguely aware in his semi-conscious state that the water was running in the bathroom and the television was on. He opened his eyes and stretched his weary limbs. A pretty blonde newswoman was on the television, stating something about the leader of that country. Shuichi watched in amazement. Yuki really did look like those people. And he spoke what sounded like perfect English to all the people that they encountered at the airport and hotel. He wondered if Yuki would have been happier if nothing had happened and he had stayed in America. 

He wondered if Yuki would have been happier with a life that did not include him 

Shuichi yawned loudly. Feeling needy from all the insecure thoughts that plagued his mind, he rolled out of bed and stripped off his tank top and boxers and padded clumsily to the bathroom. He pulled back the shower curtain and joined his lover. Yuki jumped a bit as if surprised, but he didn't yell or order Shuichi out. He took that as a positive sign and he rested his head against Yuki's chest.

Yuki I

What is it, Shuichi? He coiled his arms across his lovers' back and pressed their bodies together.

Shuichi could hear Yuki's heart beat strong and steady against his own. The warm water running down Yuki's chest tasted so clean... 

Sighing contently, Shuichi stood up on his toes and pressed his parted lips against those of his lover.

~

It really doesn't take much to get you horny, you little nymph. 

They lay in bed, a little rejuvenated from the quickie in the shower, and after their dinner of pizza, beer and cola, they weren't ready to call it a night anytime soon. Shuichi was lying on the bed naked, not bothering to get dressed, as he watched a sitcom on television.

You should talk! You slip a ring on my finger and you didn't expect me to jump your bones? Shuichi replied.

In contrast, Yuki was modestly dressed in an unbuttoned shirt and jeans, scribbling notes and occasionally translating a phrase or two from the television for Shuichi. 

I should have brought the laptop. Yuki mumbled to himself, and – to Shuichi's disappointment – deliberately avoided looking over at his naked form that was sprawled out on the bed.

I knew you were writing. Shuichi smiled as he watched Yuki write notes in the small notepad that the hotel provided.

What are you prattling about? Yuki mumbled, still focusing on his notes.

Earlier today, in the taxi, I could tell you were working on something then. Shuichi explained, teasing Yuki about the fact that he knew him so well. Shuichi caught another glimpse of the ring on his finger that matched his own. His only regret was that Yuki went and bought them matching rings without telling him. He made a mental note to take the ring when Yuki wasn't looking and get it engraved with something. I wish you engraved something on this He said holding his left hand up in the air, letting the gold catch a glimmer of light from the bedside lamp that illuminated the room.

I considered it, but I didn't think you'd appreciate it.

Oh, what did you want to write on it? Yuki looked over at his lover and smirked wickedly. Wordlessly, he tore out a sheet of paper from the back of that notepad and scribbled something on it, folded it and handed it to Shuichi. Shuichi promptly unfolded it and read the phrase Yuki wrote there.

_Kind Regards, Eiri Yuki_

Yuki you jerk! Shuichi spat as he crumpled the sheet of paper and threw it at his playfully cruel lover. It hit him on the chest before bouncing off and landing somewhere on the floor.

See? I told you that you wouldn't appreciate it. Yuki chuckled and returned to his writing.

Shuichi stuck out his tongue. I don't care. Someday you'll tell me you love me and it'll be all the sweeter because I had to wait so long to hear it from you.

Yuki smirked. Presumptuous, aren't we? He drawled and stared at Shuichi with such ferocity that Shuichi found himself unable to breathe.

Yuki broke the tension a moment later with a chuckle. So, how about you? Why do you love me? 

Shuichi smiled, finding his voice once again I don't need a reason. He said, leaning over the bed to kiss Yuki gently on his forehead. 

I just do. 

Shuichi was aware of the weight on the mattress shifting before he saw Yuki leaning over and gently pushing him back to lie against the soft down pillows. 

Well then, maybe we're the same. Yuki said, golden eyes bearing into his own. They were relaxed. The expression on his face was one that Shuichi could only describe as 'content'. A ghost of a smile lingered on his lips.

Shuichi's eyes went impossibly wide. His heart raced painfully and he found it difficult to breathe...

Maybe I don't need a reason Yuki whispered, lowering his lips to meet his own. To love you He finished, whispering against parted lips.

~fin~


End file.
